Blended Not Shaken Ministries and Publications

Christian step/single parent and blended families ministry.

Making a living vs Making a life

“Walk carefully,not as fools but as wise.” Ephesians 5:15

Too much emphasis in our world is placed upon the acquisition of knowledge, personal IQ, higher education and financial success but too few people are eager to pursue wise living or wisdom.

Wisdom is the ability to use knowledge. Wise people know what to do in each situation, when to do it and why. I desire to be a wise person. I turn 46 this month and unfortunately I can count many unwise choices I’ve made during these years. It’s seems harsh to say, but in making unwise decisions, I’ve defined myself at those times as a fool, proverbially kicking myself in anger, sadness and frustration, regretting many unwise things I’ve done and said. Although I have asked the Lord’s forgiveness for my unwise choices over the years and believe I am fully forgiven, the affects of some of those decisions I am still seeing today. And I’m not the only one paying for past decisions, as every poor choice I’ve made has hurt others as well.

It pays to be wise.

“Wisdom isn’t something theoretical, it’s very practical that affects every area of life. It gives order and purpose to life; discernment in making decisions; provides fulfillment in life to the glory of God. Wisdom keeps us in harmony with the principles and purposes that the Lord has built into his world so that as we obey God, everything works for us and not against us. This doesn’t mean we don’t experience trials and difficulties…But it means we have the ability to deal with these adversities successfully so that we grow spiritually and the Lord is glorified. W. Wiersbe. (‘Be Skillful. Commentary on Proverbs’)

True wisdom can only be seen through the lens of God’s truth. Wise people look at the world through biblical glasses. They value what God values- not what the world deems as valuable. The Psalmist said..” Cast my eyes away from worthless things..” There are certainly a myriad of worthless things out there that the world tries to convince us are important. But don’t fall for the deception. It’s one of Satan’s schemes to lead us away from us making a life God has intended for us- a life that brings the most fulfillment, joy and peace.

Over the past couple of months, I have been reading Warren Wiersbe’s commentary on the book of Proverbs, ‘Be Skillful’ and was reminded again that the “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.” (Prov. 1:7) Then , in verse 9, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.”

There are at least 18 references to the fear of the Lord in Proverbs. It’s an important issue to grasp for by it we gain wisdom.

What is the ‘fear of the Lord’?

I like this definition from Charles Bridges..

‘It is that affectionate reverence by which the child of God bends himself humbly and carefully to his Father’s law. His desire is to please Him…. to not sin against Him.’

The book of Proverbs was written to give us wisdom, instruction, understanding, prudence, knowledge, discretion, learning and counsel.

It pays to read the book of Proverbs- and often.

We can look at each of these words in another way:

Instruction = discipline.
Understanding= grasping truth
Prudence= sees reason behind something
Knowledge= skill and ability to distinguish
Discretion= ability to plan after understanding a matter
Learning= to lay hold of something
Counsel= wise guidance that steers in the right direction.

The world tells us we need to make a living and then enslaves us with what it deems the way to get there. But God urges us through His Word, that by following His ways and fearing Him, it will lead us to make a life worth the living.

Wise people know that there is so much more than this life but it’s in this life we invest into our eternal life to come.

Wise people seek God’s direction for their lives.

Wise people learn God’s truth.
Wise people obey God’s will.
Wise people share God’s blessings.
Wise people submit to God’s discipline.
Wise people enjoy positive relationships with others.
Wise people enjoy God’s care.
Wise people flee from sin.
Wise people associate with wise people.
Wise people are good friends.
Wise people discipline their speech.
Wise people work hard and are honest and generous.
Wise people curb their spending and don’t get into debt they can’t handle.

Wise people seek to influence others to trust the Lord.
Wise people are not necessarily old(er) people 🙂

If like me, you read this list and feel you don’t quite measure up, don’t be discouraged. But instead, look to Jesus and learn from Him.

“In Him are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.” (Col. 2:3)

Jesus is our best example to follow. Read the four gospels for insight into how He lived while on earth, what He saw as important, how He treated people, the way He spend His waking hours, etc, etc.

It’s also comforting to know that we have the Holy Spirit within us who illuminates the scriptures to us and guides us in right living.

“His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godly living.” (2 Peter 3:1)

You won’t become wise by scrolling through your Facebook or Instagram feed, by reading trashy magazines, watching the best news programmes, the latest reality shows or even Dr.Phil, Ellen or Oprah!(Although it continues to amaze me how many Christians hero worship such individuals!) Neither will attending numerous conferences for ‘professional development’ or copious study for another qualification make you wise. You won’t get wiser just by reading this blog either 🙂 Open your Bible. Learn from the author, our altogether all wise God. Ask Him to give you wisdom. Like He did for Solomon, the writer of Proverbs, He promises the same for you.

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TESTIMONIALS

What people say?

My Two Houses was one of my favourite books as a younger person. It helped me understand how I was feeling about having two homes. I feel as though Karina’s books have simplified a confusing situation, in a way for all ages to understand.

Charlotte

There is affirmation and encouragement to single dads and mums through “Let’s shout out to single dads” and “Sing a song to single mums”, anchoring their value, peace and endurance in the Word of God.

Librarian

Clear, fun explanations in “My family bush” of hard to decipher terms like half-brother and half-sister, full brother or sister, step-parent and how they connect to the relationships within a family.  Relating that to Jesus’ own family could be a revelation to children that their own family structure is not so different after all, that families who love and care for each other are part of God’s plan, no matter how they are made up.

Librarian

One step at a time: a step family journal“ is an honest, humorous yet life and faith affirming read for those approaching and in middle years. The use of illustrations in the text make it appealing and engaging.

Librarian

Karina’s books are very helpful when you struggle to relate to a child of separated or divorced parents when you haven’t experienced this yourself. I have quietly read or given time for a child to read one of the books and then wait for their responses. I find Karina’s books extremely helpful in my ministry to children.

Chaplain

I am often in awe of God’s amazing timing! My morning began with feelings of despair over a family relationship that had broken down. I poured out my heart to the Lord, seeking His comfort and guidance. A short time later there was a knock on my door and the postie handed me a package. It was Karina’s book “Sing a Song to Single Mums”. As I read, I came across a page that spoke directly to my situation!

Even down to the illustration! My day ended with renewed hope in God’s promise that He works all things… good things and bad things… together, for the good of those who love Him. I am so thankful to Karina for writing such a beautiful book and for the Lord’s timing in delivering it into my hands precisely when I needed to read it!

Single Mum

Caught in the Middle is one of my favourite books because, whenever I read it, I feel close to God.

River

I read My Two Houses with my entire Year 5 class. They loved it! It began a wonderful conversation which allowed many students to be vulnerable enough to be open about their feelings and situations at home as well as to a better understanding of what some of their classmates go through with divorced parents.

Primary Teacher

I have used My Two Houses with a 13-year boy during one of my sessions with him. He loved that he could relate so well with the book, stating, “That’s just like me” and I could see a change in his demeanour and body language in his knowing that there are other kids out there, just like him.

School Counselor

As a nuclear family, we love that the books contain so much scripture in teaching our children God’s word.

Ces, Father of 5, Pastor

Karina’s books give children permission to have their feelings validated and provide comfort and healing to their souls.

Tania

When it comes to blending 2 families together or doing it by yourself there are a number of unique issues.  If you find yourself in a role as a single parent, stepparent or trying to help siblings navigate their new situation it can be very tough.   

We at Focus on the Family Australia, want to help relationships and families  be as healthy as they can be.  We know it is not an easy task unifying 2 families or doing it solo.  

We highly recommend Blended Not Shaken Ministries to help provide some tools to cultivate a loving, blended or single parent home to achieve a sense of unity in your new family. 

Brett Ryan, CEO Focus on the Family Australia